The Universe - The Nothing Residing in The Everything

“Thank you for coming Ayushya; it seems like a long time since we’ve last talked.”

“Yes Mera, a long time, and at the same time, no time at all.”

“Indeed, my dear friend, indeed.”

“The tea is wonderful and your garden, as always, is beautiful.”

“Grandfather has such an attentive eye; he attends to all the details.”

“And will he be joining us today Mera?”

“Possibly later; he has a few things to do today, but you know he always welcomes the opportunity to sit with you.”

“And I enjoy being in his company as well. So, in your note you mentioned you had been pondering something?”

“Yes Ayushya, I have been re-reading the Meher Baba book, Infinite Intelligence, and on page 73 there is a statement—may I read it to you?”

“Of course.”

“‘The universe is nothing but darkness residing in Light; nothing but imagination residing in Intelligence; nothing but ignorance residing in knowledge; nothing but the Nothing residing in the Everything; nothing but the utmost finitude residing in the Infinite; nothing but the shadow residing in the Paramatma. Itself most finite, the universe resides as a drop in the infinite Ocean of Paramatma.’”

“I too have read this statement, actually a number of times, and find it quite remarkable also; what strikes you about it Mera?”

“I’m sure that the most remarkable thing for me, and this applies to all of Meher Baba’s statements as well, is that they emanate from Baba’s own direct experience. I think I can feel that.”

“Words that proceed from the Source of Truth have real meaning…”

“Yes, exactly Ayushya, and I think also that Baba’s constant reminder that, as Hafez said, ‘The universe and all its affairs are truly nothing into nothing.’”

“The words of Hafez, another fully God Realized soul, proceed from the Source of Truth.”

“Indeed.”

“Something that affects me deeply in Baba’s statement, and I wonder if it does you as well Mera, is the way he uses the word resides? ‘…darkness residing in Light… imagination residing in Intelligence… nothing but ignorance residing in knowledge…’”

“Yes, at first I even wondered if, perhaps, Baba could have said, light residing in darkness… intelligence residing in imagination.., etc.”

“That would be something quite different indeed!”

“I agree, but please don’t ask me to explain why! And what about you Ayushya, do you have some thoughts about it?”

“Yes Mera, I have thoughts—and  thoughts and thoughts—about everything!

“And I’m glad you do, as I find your thoughts to be unique and inspiring!”

“Thank you Mera, you’re too kind!”

“More tea Ayushya?”

Yes please.”

“So regarding Baba’s statement; the word residing also captures my attention because it subtly implies an impermanent or passing state—of the universe, of imagination, of ignorance, of the shadow…”

“Of everything our human consciousness takes as real and ever-lasting.”

“Exactly! It’s like my name, the name you and your grandfather suggested to me years ago, Ayushya—a period of time—a period of time defined not so much by what it is, but by the Reality that exists on either side of it—of the nothing residing in the Everything!”

“Ah Grandfather, I’m so happy to see you. Please have a seat and I’ll serve you some tea. I believe that the conversation has only just begun.”

“You were talking about the Nothing and the Everything?”

“Yes Grandfather, we were considering Meher Baba’s words in the book Infinite Intelligence—that the Nothing resides in the Everything.”

“The Nothing resides in the Everything—yes, that is very interesting.”

“Exactly, that is exactly what we were talking about. Ayushya was saying that the way in which Baba said it suggests the impermanence of illusion with regard to Reality.”

“Will you be so kind as to re-read Baba’s words?”

“Of course:

 “‘The universe is nothing but darkness residing in Light; nothing but imagination residing in Intelligence; nothing but ignorance residing in knowledge; nothing but the Nothing residing in the Everything; nothing but the utmost finitude residing in the Infinite; nothing but the shadow residing in the Paramatma. Itself most finite, the universe resides as a drop in the infinite Ocean of Paramatma.’”

“Grandfather, what were you thinking just now when you had your eyes closed?”

“I was remembering that in the ghazal I was reading the deer first approached the hiding place of the hunter and called out; ‘Why are shooting at me? I am your friend.’ But as time went on and the hunter, still hidden, continued to shoot arrow into the deer, the deer called out again; “You continue to shoot your arrows at me, yet refuse to show yourself to me. Over time, you and your arrows have taken everything from me. I have no life anymore; I have no desire for anything of this world or the next; all I have are these wounds. So, I implore you, either show yourself to me, or continue to shoot your arrows, because it has come to pass that in each wound I see the image of your face and long for you more and more and still yet more!’ That is was I was thinking Mera.”

“The beauty of that ghazal is beyond all words, but why Grandfather, did Baba’s words inspire that ghazal in you just then?”

“Because, my dear, for me, Baba’s words are those arrows he sends to us to remind us to remember him until the time determined by him to reveal himself to us as our own most-beloved Self.”

 “And are we to conclude from your story of the deer and the hunter that you experience Meher Baba’s words as the hunter’s arrows?”

“My dear, do you remember Upasani Maharaj’s description of the Jivatma (embodied soul) as, ‘that pure celestial soul identified with the projections of the mind.’?”

“Yes.”

“So as a way of answering your question, it is my jiv in the state of experiencing imagination as reality that experiences Baba’s words as arrows, while my atma simultaneously experiences Baba’s words to be like water is to a thirsty man, or a raft is to a drowning one.”

“That is your experience?”

“Yes, but only sometimes, and always only more or less.”

“May I see the book?”

“Of course Ayushya.”

“I would enjoy discussing with both of you these words from Meher Baba regarding the consciousness of the sixth plane.

‘The Infinite Intelligence as sant, akmal, or pir creates the universe infinitely and knows and understands this. It feels that the universe has come forth from Itself and, moreover, feels the universe to be its own imagination or shadow. It realizes the universe for the benefit and salvation of others, to draw others from the low material plane to the higher spiritual planes. It does not take Self-realization and does not enter into Nirvikalp Samadhi, knowing that if It did so, It would not be able to come back to the planes, as the Sadguru does, but would become a Majub, unable to serve the world for its salvation.’”

“How beautiful! Yes Ayushya there is so much in this statement, where shall we begin?”

“The first thing, for me, is the statement that on the sixth plane, the highest and final plane before Realization, one is actually aware of oneself as the creator of the universe! To my knowledge, Baba has not revealed this fact before?”

“Indeed, although he does say as much in God Speaks, I don’t recall seeing exactly this formulation in any of his other written teachings—Grandfather?”

“Nor I.”

“And Grandfather, does something strike you about Baba’s statement?”

“Yes, you know that in the various forms of Buddhism there is the Bodhisattva vow—where the practitioner dedicates his life and future lifetimes to working for the emancipation of all sentient beings from the grip of samsara.”

   

“Yes, Grandfather, I was thinking the same thing—that Baba’s words bring great clarity to the subject.”

“Of course not all who take this vow are on the sixth plane, I’m quite sure that most are not, but I believe the vow is rooted in the striving to be able to live such a life of service as does the real six-planer—the sant, akmal, or pir.”

“Yes, and also that Baba reminds us that when the sant, akmal, or pir does enter into Nirvikalp Samadhi (Realization), he does not take another birth in creation—his connection to the planes is severed forever.”

“Except for those very few who take that next divine journey to become a Sadguru.”

“Indeed!”

                                                                     

 “Ayushya, you had an interesting expression on your face just now?”

“I was thinking about our conversation, how it began—can you please read the quote again from Infinite Intelligence?”

“Of course; ‘The universe is nothing but darkness residing in Light; nothing but imagination residing in Intelligence; nothing but ignorance residing in knowledge; nothing but the Nothing residing in the Everything; nothing but the utmost finitude residing in the Infinite; nothing but the shadow residing in the Paramatma. Itself most finite, the universe resides as a drop in the infinite Ocean of Paramatma.’”

“Mera, you mentioned that Meher Baba’s words help you to remember—your grandfather said as much, and it is the same for me also. I was just now considering how I work with Baba’s words regarding the nature of the universe and the reality of my Self. 

“You know, Baba gives us so much; not only does He tell us that the universe is but a shadow, is  but imagination, is but Nothing, He also goes into great depth about the mechanics of the expression  of this shadow, this, imagination, this Nothing. For example, He tells us that mind creates the universe and mind takes the experience of the universe.

“He tells us that the nature of the mind is to think and that the universe is thought imagined by the mind. He explains that it is also thought in the form of gross and gross and subtle bodies that take the experience of its own imagination which is the universe.

“The reason why Baba’s words have such power is because His words are not ideas that He has come up with or read somewhere, they are the expression of His direct experience. Baba truly experiences the universe and all its affairs as truly nothing into nothing.

“Of course there is a vast difference between my state and Baba’s state, and therefore I don’t experience mind—its imaginings and its thoughts—in the way that Baba explains. 

“And also, of course, no amount of thinking on my part can bring me to Baba’s experience, but I do find the attempt to reconcile Meher Baba’s experience with my own experience is like a meditation for me, and I sincerely enjoy the activity, but most importantly, it is a way that I can remember Baba.”

“And Ayushya, can you give us an example of what you do?”

“I will try, although it is always different. Now, the other day I decided to take a walk. I left my apartment in Istanbul and began walking down the street. As I walked I tried to bring myself into the state of presence. It was a cold rainy day, but the street was still full of people. I began to consider; ‘How much of this ‘reality’ that I am experiencing do I feel that I am creating?”

“There seemed to be two possibilities; the first was that I definitely, through my own decision, had decided to take the walk and decided to find the state of presence. I could have decided to stay home and not walk. That seemed clear; I was the creator of my walk. 

“The second possibility had to do with that which I could not take credit for. I had decided to take the walk, but I had not decided that it would be cold and rainy or that the street would be crowded with people.”

“Are you speaking about the question of free will versus predestination?”

“In a way yes, and I do recall when the question was once asked of Meher Baba, He asked the questioner, ‘Can you pick up your foot from the ground?’ The questioner stood on one foot. Baba then asked the questioner to pick up the other foot. Of course, he couldn’t, and that was Baba’s answer to the question—and it is also was my answer to my question; the first foot was taking the walk but the second foot, the foot I could not lift  through an act of will, was the cold rainy day and the people I encountered along the way.

“On one level these two possibilities, or states, seemed clear to me, but I wanted to experience them as I walked. Of course, I could not experience them as Baba does, but there was a clarity to my state—another dimension to my experience—do I dare say that I was just a little more awake?  Mr. Salih, do you happen to recall that poem you once wrote for Mera on her thirteenth birthday?”

 A Sip of Wine

“Inscribe these words in your heart. Nothing is real but God, Nothing matters but love for God!”

Oh Lord, my eyes believe that all they see is real —

Are not these stones and trees and birds and bees

and creatures of the earth and sky and sea real?

My lover, they are not real,

the Self within them is what’s real.

Their forms are only shadows cast

 that come and go

from nothing to nowhere.

See them, love them,

but upon them do not depend.

And my Lord,

what of men who speak and walk and love and hate,

who laugh and cry with joy and pain,

and grow from babes to live and die —

are they not real — like You and I?

My lover, they are not real,

nor is the pain and pleasure that they feel.

The Self within them is what’s real,

while their forms like clouds that cross the sky

appear as shapes that dance and cry.

Know them, love them,

but upon them do not depend —

the Self that is real has no beginning or end.

But my Lord, I am a man.

Am I not real,

or my thoughts and what I feel?

Who is it then that seeks for You

and in my heart what voice speaks to You?

And are You real or just a dream?

It seems that nothing’s what it seems!

My lover, you are not real,

the Self within you is what’s real —

that Self and I are really one.

When you experience this, my work is done.

You say that nothing’s what it seems,

and that’s because your life’s my dream,

though in this dream my life’s displaced

and found again when you’re effaced.

Know Me.

Love Me.

Upon Me alone depend.

Within you I will awaken in Bliss,

beyond beginning and without end.

Remember, dear one, these words I say,

‘Nothing is real but God.

Nothing matters but love for God.’

 “Grandfather, I have always treasured that poem you wrote for me. In its most sweet way it brings me back to what Baba always comes back to—always reminds us of—that God alone is real!”

“Yes, Baba is so very consistent. The more and more I read His words, the more and more I realize that He is always saying the same exact thing—He is always showing us who He is, who I am, and what is the true nature of His creation—He is always revealing the nature of the relationship among all of the various expressions of the same one Infinity.”

“Indeed Ayushya, indeed! I remember a talk in Beams From Meher Baba called The Whim from the Beyond, in which Baba states, ‘In the Beyond-Beyond state of God there is unconscious inaction; at the goal of man there is conscious inaction; and in the intermediate state there is conscious action which is established in illusion.’”

“Indeed, conscious action is the goal of the man-state in creation. Did not Baba say that conscious action in the man state brings about a fusion point which becomes the medium for effecting harmony among the gross, subtle, and mental bodies?”

“I believe that is accurately put; and did He not say also, that the fusion point also brings all three bodies under the control of what is sometimes called the Universal Body, which is the seat of the Universal Mind?”

“Yes, all that ran through my mind when Ayushya was talking about his walk through the streets of Istanbul and how he worked to establish a state of presence from which to observe, as it were, the world through the eyes of Reality rather than the eyes of Illusion.”

“Indeed, I believe that the very effort creates the fusion point—whether the effort to see the world through the eyes of reality is actually successful or not.”

“True, I cannot claim to have actually seen the world through the eyes of Reality—through Baba’s eyes.”

“Conscious action, it appears in so many teachings;

‘Be awake, do not sleep!’ (Jesus in the New Testament).

‘Remember, be here now.’ (Ramdas—from the book of the same name).

‘Remember yourself!’ (Gurdjieff).

"And grandfather, can you repeat the Sufi saying about the son of the moment?”

“Indeed, ‘Think not about the past or the future; become the son of the moment; and take death as the target before your eyes.’”

“More tea Ayushya?”

“Yes please.”

“So while listening to grandfather and you talking about Baba’s words, I began to remember a school friend of mine when I was just a little girl. Her family was Christian and she used to repeat this affirmation in church:

‘I believe in God, the Father Almighty,
maker of heaven and earth;
And in Jesus Christ his only Son, our Lord;
who was conceived by the Holy Spirit,
born of the Virgin Mary,
suffered under Pontius Pilate,
was crucified, dead, and buried;
the third day he rose from the dead;
he ascended into heaven,
and sitteth at the right hand of God the Father Almighty;
from thence he shall come to judge the quick and the dead.
I believe in the Holy Spirit,
the holy Catholic Church,
the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body,
and the life everlasting.’

“Even at the time, I used to think that many of these words were generally consistent with some of the things that Baba said, but some others seemed, well, a bit off.”

“And did you talk to your friend about this?”

“I thought about it, but I didn’t, for what did I know… The affirmation was about belief, but belief is not experience, and for me belief is not enough. For me, I wanted to experience for myself—know for myself— the reality behind these assertions.”

“Indeed. Why sit on the shore and argue about the ocean without having ever experienced the ocean and its depths?”

“Indeed Grandfather! What is the good of sitting on the shore and arguing about the nature of the ocean when the ocean is right there for all to experience?”

“Yes, my dear, there are those who hear about the ocean and the shore but never go to the ocean and the shore. Then there are those who go to the ocean and the shore but only sit on the shore and gaze at the ocean. Then there are those who venture to the water and dip there feet. A few might also venture a little further, but only a very very few will dive so deep into the ocean that they lose themselves totally in the ocean only to find themselves as the Ocean.”

“Yes, while the All Merciful One continues to remind us that at one time or another all will acquire that longing to experience the ocean—each and every one—each in their own time—like the seed that eventually sprouts, and grows into a plant, and flowers, and opens fully to the sun.”

“While in the meantime, Meher Baba also reminds us, ‘Live not in ignorance. Do not waste your precious life-span in differentiating and judging your fellowmen, but learn to long for the love of God.’”

 “More tea Grandfather?”

“Yes my dear; you know I was just thinking about tea.”

“Yes?”

“Yes, I was imagining that there was nothing else—only tea.”

“Please go on.”

“Yes, just tea—Infinite tea—tea without beginning and without end—nothing above it or below it or around it—just tea everywhere, nothing except tea.”

“Are you saying tea leaves?”

“Yes, exactly, Ayushya, and that tea gets the whim to experience itself—to know itself.”

“And for that experience, for that knowledge of itself, the tea leaves need to become tea.”

“Yes, the tea leaves need to become tea and then the tea needs to drink itself!”

“Amazing! But how is that possible?”

“Exactly Mira, that is what I was considering; for to become tea to drink it needs water, a way to heat the water, and a pot for steeping.”

“And then it needs cups to drink the tea and a form to taste it.”

“Exactly, but none of these exist because tea leaves are the only reality—the only thing that exists.”

“A dilemma! What’s the way out?”

“Well the only way out is for the tea leaves to imagine the water and the pot.”

“And even imagine itself as someone who can drink the tea.”

“Yes, the tea leaves needs to imagine that it is the pot, the water, the cup, the brewer of the tea, and the drinker of the tea.”

“Indeed, the tea needs to be the imaginer and the one who experienced that imagination.”

“And so we are talking about Infinite Intelligence as teas leaves.”

“Exactly, that is what I was thinking.”

 “Ayushya, I understand you have been doing some traveling these days…”

“Yes Mira, it’s been very enjoyable. You know, a vacation is a great metaphor for reincarnation.”

“How so?”

“Well, where one goes on vacation is determined by the plans one puts in place to go somewhere, and this is determined by sanskaras accumulated during one’s lifetime—places one visited or heard about, the amount of time one have for the holidays, one’s financial situation too…  In other words, as Meher Baba has taught us, one’s current lifetime is the consolidated mold of the sanskaras gathered in one’s previous lifetime.”

“Indeed!”

“Then, as the time of the vacation approaches, one begins to get his affairs in order—like the arrangements one makes at the end of one’s lifetime…

“The journey begins with travel and this is like the death state between lifetimes.

“One eventually arrives at his destination and what happens? He begins to establish patterns and habits consistent with his previous lifetime. For me, I begin to establish those things—those activities—which ‘at home’ were important to me. I find a place to do my music; I establish a time and place for my meditation and prayers. I stock my kitchen with the food and wine that I enjoy. In other words, I create my new life—my vacation life—consistent with the habits and patterns that I am familiar with. This is very much as it is with the taking of a new life—a new incarnation.”

“Yes, I can see that—very interesting.”

“These habits and patterns may take some time to establish, because in each new incarnation one needs to go through a kind of orientation process in which one begins to ‘find oneself’ again. This is similar to the ‘relearning’ or ‘remembering’ that one goes through during the transition from infant, to child, to adult—and the timing of this relearning or remembering is also consistent with one’s experiences in their previous lifetime(s).”

“And when the vacation is over?”

“In fact, it is just one vacation after another—one lifetime after another— until, as Maulana Shabistari said, “He returns to the door from which he first came out, although in his journey he went from door to door.”

“Thank you Ayushya, your explanation is as enjoyable as it is enlightening.”

“Thank you Mira, and so now to return to our initial conversation, is there anything more you wish to add concerning Meher Baba’s teachings found in the book, Infinite Intelligence?”

“I’m sure I could talk about it endlessly—every page is so interesting.”

“For example?”

“Yes for example, Baba’s statements regarding pran and akash. Originally they were one, but with the onset of the thinking (imagination) of Infinite Intelligence, they became split, and then in their attempt to reunite, pran (as energy), began to work on akash (as space), to fill that space, and the result of this action was the production, through thinking, of infinite subtle and gross forms that could experience the imagination of the thinking of Infinite Intelligence’s Infinite mind.”

“Yes Mira, there is for me also, something unique in Baba’s explanation of this topic—the expression of a kind of coherent dynamic that reconciles all of the various states of God. Mr. Salih?”

“I am reminded that before the beginning and after the end there is Unity, but in-between, there is duality which expresses itself everywhere and in everything. I wonder if Baba’s teaching regarding pran and akash is what is being expressed the ancient story of Adam and Eve? The garden is the imagination of Infinite mind and Adam and Eve represent the embodiment of pran and akash respectively. Their children are the result of their attempt to reunite.”

“And the snake? And the forbidden fruit?”

“Indeed, Baba’s explanation can be found in Bhauji’s book, The Nothing and the Everything, in which He explains that Adam entered creation in a state of ignorance—meaning without consciousness—and that illusion—the snake—working on ignorance—created the appetite in Adam for more and more fruit—fruit being knowledge—knowledge being consciousness.”

“Consciousness at first being of the imagination and only in the end freeing itself to be of its Real Self—Reality.”

“Exactly, as was said earlier, “‘He returns to the door from which he first came out, although in his journey he went from door to door.’”

© copyright Michael Kovitz, 2019  

 

Consciousness - The Key To Everything

“For with right methods and the right efforts man can acquire control of consciousness, and can become conscious of himself with all that it implies. And what it implies we in our present state do not even imagine.” – The Psychology of Man’s Possible Evolution, P.D. Ouspensky

Even as a child I could not totally believe in the world that surrounded me and the truth of the explanations given to me, often without me asking, by family, teachers, and religious authorities. It was just that I couldn’t whole-heartedly accept either the reality or the importance or the limitations of what I saw or was told.

And so I lived in my own inner world and very few things got into it, the things that did—the things that I responded to with anything more than annoyance, irritation, or concern—were those things that seemed to hold a promise of something more—something more like my dreams.

Peter Pan is a story about a little boy who never grows up. As a child, it touched my inner-world—my dreams—and I loved it because it made me feel that birth, life, and death were somehow not as real or as final  as they appeared to be and as I was being led to believe. For me, the boy who never grew old was about the Reality of the eternal and infinite as opposed to the supposed reality of the passing and transitory. Of course, at the time, it was just a feeling and the words I use today were not there yet.

Rock and Roll Music spoke to me as well, especially the love songs that glorified love to such a degree that they touched the transcendental and whispered to me of what I later would describe as Divine love—much in the same way that Sufi poetry seems to be talking about the earthly lover and beloved but is really about something else, the game of love played out between the earthly lover—Jivatma—and the Divine Beloved—Shivatma.

But I was only a kid, and Reality was but a dream—a dream from which I did not want to be disturbed.

In time I learned that I was not alone and that others not only shared my dream, but some of them had even experienced the Reality they had dreamed of. And so I read, I tried to practice, I took from here and there whatever seemed to be relevant to my search—my dream—but no one thing seemed to have it all for me…

Eventually, I came across books by P.D. Ouspensky and then later the teachings of his teacher, George I. Gurdjieff. Ouspensky spoke very clearly and simply about the higher possibilities of man. He said that man as he is in life is only partly developed, but with the right kind of work on himself could achieve states and abilities far beyond those commonly known, and the key to the whole thing was consciousness.

Consciousness; I felt something very right about that, but what was it? What was consciousness? The word was not new to me. There was consciousness, there was unconsciousness, there was sub-consciousness, there was higher consciousness, there was self-consciousness, and there was Self-consciousness. So many different consciousnesses, but what was consciousness? The word ‘awareness’ seemed similar—was it the same?

I decided that consciousness was like a light—the brighter the light, the more one could see. I pictured a dark room with many things in it, so I could not see anything in the room. But turn on a little light and I could see shadowy forms; increase the light and there was more clarity and I could see more things. So, consciousness was like a light and I decided that awareness was where the light was directed. If consciousness was a flashlight, then the act of pointing it was awareness.

It began to make sense to me—sort of—but was unconsciousness the state of no light, or light without awareness? What about sub-consciousness? I was pretty sure that super-consciousness and Self-consciousness suggested a higher power of light—maybe…

So, I was thinking about consciousness, but was I experiencing consciousness? I had learned that real yogis studied themselves—that their bodies and minds were laboratories. Ouspensky and Gurdjieff talked about self-remembering and self-observation—was self-observation the key to understanding? Was self-observation the tool to employ in the laboratory? 

“The senses are superior to the objects of the senses,

The mind is superior to the senses,

And the Self is superior to the mind.

That Self and Infinite, Eternal God are One.”— Bhagavad Gita, as read by Jacob Needleman

Gurdjieff and Ouspensky also talked about attention. In fact, in the Gurdjieff Work, it was considered a big deal. But like consciousness, attention was something that I needed to clarify for myself. I went back to my assumption, that consciousness was like a light and awareness was where that light was focused.

In the Gurdjieff Work a distinction was made between two types of attention. There was a mechanical attention, one that gets pulled or attracted by people and things—I hear a sound and I automatically look in its direction—and there was an attention—we could call it intentional—that one could direct with effort to some object while maintaining an awareness of oneself.

To illustrate the first attention Ouspensky used the image of a line with an arrow head pointing from oneself to the object of attraction, and to illustrate the second kind of attention he used a line with arrow heads on both sides; one pointed at the object and the other pointed back at oneself.  

Yes, it all made perfect sense to me, on an intellectual level, but I still needed to experience and observe all this for myself, for as Kabir once said, “If you haven’t experienced it, it is not true.” So it was back to the laboratory of my self to perform some more experiments.

I quickly learned the difficulty of my task. First and foremost was the difficulty of remembering my aim and then being able to remain in the laboratory. Sometimes days would go by in which I didn’t remember anything about my tasks or my laboratory. In retrospect I learned that these periods were when I was asleep, not asleep as I am at night in my bed, but asleep in the way that the Masters—the Awake Ones—are always reminding us we are asleep. Put another way, most of the time I was not running my trip, on the contrary, most of the time my trip was running me. Was this what Gurdjieff meant when he used the term “the terror of the situation?”

While still in the Gurdjieff Work I began reading Meher Baba’s book, God Speaks. Actually, I devoured this book, or maybe it devoured me? For a period of a few days I poured myself into this book. I don’t think I was ever the same after that. About what happened I can only say, and pray that it is not a lie, that some little iota of Meher Baba’s Avataric consciousness merged with my limited illusory consciousness and like a seed began over time to take root.

God Speaks is made up of ten parts—sort of like chapters. The word consciousness is used in the titles of five of those ten parts. God Speaks goes into great detail regarding the evolution of consciousness, reincarnation, and the involution of consciousness. It is so interesting to me that the dedication of the book is, “To the Universe—the Illusion that sustains Reality.”

For me, one of the most striking distinctions that Meher Baba made was that consciousness was full and complete by the achievement of the human form. Evolution was about acquiring that consciousness through the association of consciousness with the experiences of numerous pre-human forms such as mineral, vegetable, animal, etc.

The achievement of the human form marked the beginning of the next phase of the journey which He called reincarnation. Reincarnation was not about acquiring more or higher consciousness, it was about loosening the hold of impressions on that consciousness—like preparing the mirror so that the dirt and grime that had been collected during evolution could be wiped away without breaking the mirror.

The last phase was called involution. The process of involution was about removing the dirt and grime from the mirror so that the mirror—consciousness—could reflect to the Self its own Perfection ending in Union of that consciousness with the ever existing eternal Self—Self Consciousness—God Realization—so many terms have been used to describe it… 

Meanwhile back at the laboratory of efforts…

 Meditation has always been an instrument I have used in my laboratory, and although what I do and how I do it seldom remains the same for long, some aspects of it have remained consistent.

My physical body is pretty obedient to my mind in that I can sit still for a period of time without discomfort.

My mind is a different story however. To borrow a line from an old Bobby Darin song, “It’s never in one place; it roams from town to town.” But I have learned a few techniques that do work sometimes.

One is bringing my mind to the sensation of my breath. The body is always in the present moment and to follow the in and out of the breath keeps my mind from wandering; however, the mind is a pretty good multi-tasker and has found ways to watch the breath and still roam around. I have to make an effort to really watch the breath, I mean, to stay with it all the way through the inhalation and the exhalation and the sandhis that are in-between. Sometimes I can do it, sometimes not. It helps if I just try to do one breath at a time.

When I am successful, an interesting thing happens—it’s easy to miss. I observe that my mind is working—I can see it working. Should I put an exclamation point there? I can see it working!

But who or what is that I who is seeing? It’s not the body; can the mind itself be seeing the mind—or is it something else?

Rumi said, “The mind is a great and a wondrous thing that can bring you to the door of the King…” Who is the King? Earlier in this post, I quoted the Bhagavad Gita:

“The senses are superior to the objects of the senses,

The mind is superior to the senses,

And the Self is superior to the mind.

That Self and Infinite, Eternal God are One.”

Based on things that Meher Baba has said, I have concluded, that the King and the Self are one and the same. The King is Infinite Eternal God in either or both His/Its impersonal and personal manifestation.

And so, in my meditation, once I achieve some control of my mind, I can bring it to the door of the King—I can bring it to the door of the Self—and because it is my most sincere conviction, I can bring to the embodiment of that Eternal, Infinite, All Knowing, All Blissful, All Powerful, God—Self—the name and form of the one who I know as Meher Baba. Self and for me, my Self and Meher Baba are one and the same. He said as much, “You and I are not we—but One.” – Meher Baba

I know there are many readers of these posts—some are followers of Meher Baba, but many are not—they are Buddhists, Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Sufis, and followers of other isms and no isms at all. When I say that, to me, that Self and Meher Baba are one, I absolutely believe that anyone can also say that that Self is one and the same as Buddha, Krishna, Jesus; Paramatma, Ahura-mazda, Allah; Higher Consciousness, Beloved God… In other words, one can fill in the blank anyway they wish, the Self and _______ are One.

I have observed that there is a unique kind of joy that I experience when my mind becomes visible to me as it senses my breath. I have also noticed that there is another kind of joy that I experience when the attention of my mind is focused upon the name and form of Meher Baba. These joys are quite different—quite distinct—from each other and from the sense-based pleasures of certain mechanical thoughts and feelings.

But of course Rumi’s remark, “The mind is a great and a wondrous thing that can bring you to the door of the King…” can be taken on many different levels. I can certainly apply it to my experience in meditation, but it can also be applied to the state of the sixth plane saint—which I am most convinced that I am not. A sixth plane saint is on the highest plane of consciousness before the state of union with God. The sixth plane is the highest plane of creation, but as Meher Baba points out, it is still in illusion. It is an incredibly interesting state to ponder;

“He ‘sees’ God continuously but cannot see himself in God as God. Therefore he cannot reconcile his feeling-of-sight of God with his own identity with God; and thus he longs for, feels for, has pangs for union with God whom he ‘sees’ face to face.” – God Speaks, 2^nd edition, page 52

And so I return to my original questions regarding consciousness, because Meher Baba states that there are three different stages of consciousness; gross consciousness—consciousness of the creation as experienced through the senses—, subtle consciousness—consciousness of the sphere of energy—, and mental consciousness—consciousness of the fifth and sixth planes—the planes of the mind—consciousness of the mental sphere, consciousness of God—the Infinite and Eternal “I am God" state of consciousness with all its attendant Infinite Knowledge, Infinite Power, and Infinite Bliss. And so indeed, the story goes on…

“All souls (atmas) were, are and will be in the Over-Soul (Paramatma). Souls are all One.” – Part 1, page, 1, first line of Meher Baba’s book, God Speaks

A few lines down Meher Baba states:

“There is a difference in the consciousness of souls; there is a difference in the planes of consciousness of souls; there is a difference in the experience of souls and thus there is a difference in the state of souls.”

A few more lines down He states:

“Most souls are conscious of the gross body; some souls are conscious of the subtle body; a few souls are conscious of the mental body; and a few souls are conscious Self.”

 And then He says:

“Most souls have experience of the gross sphere (world); some souls have experience of the subtle sphere (world); a few souls have experience of the mental sphere (world); and a few souls have experience of the Over-Soul.”

Now with regard to the capacity of my ‘laboratory’, I can clearly state that exploration—in the sense of experiences—of the subtle, mental, and Over-Soul are not available to me at this time. This is not that unusual with regard to followers of Meher Baba who generally prefers to take His followers through the higher spheres—the subtle and mental—in His own words, ‘blindfolded’.

He has said that the experiences of these higher spheres are so alluring that one can easily get lost in them—jazd—and therefore inhibit the aspirant’s progress to the final destination—God Realization.

From my own perspective I can definitely see the wisdom in that; I mean, if I can so easily get attached with all the various sense objects of the gross sphere, then how attached would I get to the sight of angels, or the powers to create and destroy whole worlds, or even the seeing of everything as mental projections of my own mind?

Anyway, if one is interested, one can find descriptions of all of these higher experiences of the planes of consciousness in Meher Baba’s book God Speaks and in Bhau Kalchuri’s book, The Nothing and the Everything (the material of which is drawn directly from points Meher Baba gave to Bhau).

It is interesting to me that on the other hand, Gurdjieff never talked much about these higher experiences, preferring to remind his students that, in the words of Kabir, “Until you experience it, it is not true.”  In other words, he was telling his students to work where they found themselves and not give much importance to talk about things they did not experience.

To me, he was attempting to get his followers to the same point of view that Meher Baba was attempting to get with regard to His followers, but from a whole different direction; the former by not giving his followers material to feed their imagination and the latter by revealing so many of the secrets of the spiritual path that His followers would lose their curiosity about them. Anyway, this is just my opinion; but as the Sufis say, “Only God knows—Inshalla!”

In meditation I can become aware of the working of my mind. It’s a subtle and yet profoundly different state than when I am identified with my mind.

When I am identified with my mind there is no sense of self other than my identity with my mind—my thoughts, feelings, sensations, and inner-conversations. When I am identified with my mind I am whatever it explicitly or implicitly tells me I am. For example, the mind perceives a sensation in the body as an itch and the body immediately responds by scratching the itch, while I am only vaguely aware, if at all, of what’s going on. After the itch, the mind moves on to something else, some other topic, again without my intention, direction, or participation.

But in those unique moments when I am aware of the workings of my mind there is someone, some-self, present that is being aware of the workings of my mind and can even choose to watch it work or direct it to certain topics or activities. My question is; is that someone just another part of the mind itself, or is it something other? Understand that I am not seeking an answer to a question; questions have energy while answers kill questions. What I want is to know by experience. Questions unveil Truth while answers obscure it by pretending to know.

In the Gurdjieff Work we talked about the lack of unity in man—that there is no single I who runs the show—that man consists of many I’s—that man’s name is Legion. I have no doubt that my many I’s are of the mind—are the thoughts, feelings, and desires of my mind.

Gurdjieff also said that if a man wishes to become more—more conscious—more whole—more one—He must first get his house of I’s in order by appointing a deputy steward—an appropriate I or group of I’s that are aware of his wish and have the authority—the energy—to put the house of I’s in order. He goes on to say that only when the house is in order will the master of the house move in and take control. The master of the house is the Self beyond the mind.

Rumi said, “The mind is a great and a wondrous thing that can bring you to the door of the King—once there it must be removed—like shoes upon entering a holy place.”

So when I choose to watch my mind and direct it to certain subjects, is that I my deputy steward—my collection of I’s who knows and respects my longing for God—for Self? And when this deputy steward is in charge, is this state connected to what Gurdjieff called self-remembering, attention, or self-observation?

Now, there is a book called Infinite Intelligence. This book came into print a few years ago. It is based upon an extensive series of points that were discovered in a couple of handwritten notebooks years after Meher Baba’s physical death. These points were written in an unidentified hand—not Meher Baba’s—yet it is clear beyond a doubt that the points and style of language are Meher Baba’s.

These notebooks have also been published under the title of Intelligence Notebooks and can be found online at https://sites.google.com/site/intelligencematerials/ .

Reading the Intelligence Notebooks is difficult not only because of the depth of their content, but also because they are written in a few different languages. In order to make these one of a kind teachings accessible to more people, some followers of Meher Baba created the book Infinite Intelligence with translations and in-depth commentaries. I have read both the Notebooks and Infinite Intelligence and feel that they bring a new insight and perspective to the question of consciousness.

It is my opinion that with regard to the totality of Meher Baba’s teachings, Meher Baba spends a lot of time creating context—that He wants us to know intellectually who we are, who He is, and what both the creation and God have to do with it all. I think He wants to give us an overview of the journey and His role in it.

To accomplish all this He often expresses Himself through metaphor and allegory. For example, in God Speaks, Meher Baba likens God to an Infinite Ocean made up of innumerable drops (souls) in various states of experience and consciousness. The end of the process is when the drop realizes itself to be the Ocean.

“I am like God and God is like me.
I am as large as God; He is as small as I.
He cannot above me, nor I beneath him be.” – Silesius (Trans. used in the film Cape Fear.)

In the story of the Mischievous Chicken that can be found in the book The Nothing And The Everything, Meher Baba casts Himself in the role of the mischievous chicken whose curiosity about what lies beyond the security of the mother hen causes him to journey forth seven times eating all that he experiences along the way until he finally eats himself!

 In the Intelligence Notebooks, God is represented as Infinite Intelligence. What is intelligence? Intelligence is the capacity to know. What is Infinite Intelligence? The capacity to know infinitely—Infinite Knowledge.

But to know is to think and mind is necessary to think. To know Infinite Knowledge, Infinite thought is required, and to think infinitely, the capacity of Infinite Mind is necessary.

So, what is thinking? In the Intelligence Notebooks, Meher Baba clearly states that consciousness and thinking are one and the same; which, of course, leads me back to the laboratory.

“Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream,

merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,

life is but a dream.”

So goes the old rhyme, but, this dream, where does it come from?”

In the Intelligence Notebooks Meher Baba says that it is the mind that dreams and it is the mind that experiences—takes the experience of—that dream. (Meher Baba uses the Sanskrit word upabhog to convey the nature of taking the experience of. “Enjoyment, pleasure; particularly sensual pleasure; an experience…”) – Infinite Intelligence, glossary, page 711

And what is this dreaming—this creating—other than thinking? And what is this experiencing of —this taking of the upabhog of—other than thinking too?

“It is natural for the Infinite Intelligence to think and realize (experience) Its imagination but supernatural (super here means above or beyond) for It to think and realize Itself. When superconscious, It thinks and realizes Itself, and this is Real Consciousness; (but) when ordinarily conscious, It realizes the universe, and this is false consciousness.” – Ibid, page 105

Previously I quoted;

“The senses are superior to the objects of the senses,

The mind is superior to the senses,

And the Self is superior to the mind.

That Self and Infinite, Eternal God are One.”— Bhagavad Gita, as read by Jacob Needleman

Is not the entire universe a sense object that the mind experiences through the senses? What Meher Baba brings to this teaching is that the mind is not only the creator of the universe—that the mind thinks—creates— the universe, but also, by thinking, the mind experiences—takes the upabhog—of its own creation.

So I’m walking around my neighborhood one day, allowing my mind to experience the sensations of my body connected to movement. There is a feeling of being in the moment—being in my body—self-sensing…

Trying to maintain that state, I direct my attention—my thoughts—to the world around me. I see trees and sky and birds and squirrels and shrubs and plants and flowers… I see ‘inanimate’ things too—buildings and automobiles, concrete and signs. I remember the words of Meher Baba;

“It is natural for the Infinite Intelligence to think and realize (experience) Its imagination, but supernatural (super here means above or beyond) for It to think and realize Itself. When superconscious, It thinks and realizes Itself, and this is Real Consciousness; (but) when ordinarily conscious, It realizes the universe, and this is false consciousness.” – Ibid, page 105

The Infinite Intelligence and the Self are one—are the same—but to experience Itself It must be conscious, and to be conscious, consciousness is required. Meher Baba said that consciousness is full and complete in the human form, but cannot reveal the Self to Itself because consciousness in the human form is veiled by impressions—sanskaras—the dust, so to speak, of   consciousness’ from the stone form to the human form.

This dust is like the dirt and grime that can accumulate on a mirror and countless incarnations in the human form are necessary to remove it. And this I believe is my situation—I don’t experience the Self, I experience the self and the universe that mind in the state of false thinking creates and preserves and destroys…

I see my neighbor walking down the street in my direction. At the same time a magnificent hawk glides across the sky and lands in a tall tree. I almost lose state my of awareness and become the automaton of my personality, but I hold on to my self-sensing while I greet my neighbor and direct her attention to the hawk in the tree. She see the hawk and we talk…

But if the hawk is my creation then why does she see it—and, as a matter of fact, why do we even see each other and are able to agree on what we are seeing? And that we are on the same street and see the same sky and trees… You see where I am going…

Bob Dylan once said in a song, “I’ll let you be in my dream if I can be in yours…”

But let’s remember that this dream is not only mine, or my dream and my neighbor’s, it is also the dream of the hawk and the trees, and, and…

“We’ve all heard the question; “If a tree falls in the forest and there is no one to hear it, does it make a sound?” Of course the question is a non-sequitur because a tree cannot grow without other trees and shrubs and insects and birds… A tree cannot fall and not be heard by the forest and a tree cannot exist without the forest.

In other words, how is it that we all agree on these things? How is it that my neighbor, and the hawk, and I agree that the hawk is a hawk, the neighbor is the neighbor, and I am Michael? The answer is twofold: One, we don’t really agree at all—that my neighbor’s hawk is not my hawk, nor is it the hawk’s hawk. And two, the hawk’s hawk, and the neighbor’s hawk, and my hawk are all the same one dream of Infinite’s Intelligence’s Infinite Mind and that is why it all somehow seems to work together.

“More tea Ayushya?”

“Yes please.”

“More tea Grandfather?”

“Yes please, and then dear Granddaughter please read to Ayushya what you and I were reading before.”

“So here in Infinite Intelligence Baba says; ‘Through Infinite Thinking the Infinite Intelligence creates the universe, through false Infinite Thinking, It realizes the universe, and through real Infinite Thinking, It realizes Itself.’”

“Baba sums it all up so simply and easily.”

“Indeed.”

“When one knows—when one has been through it all—when one has taken the experience of the alpha and the omega and everything in between and then goes beyond it and realizes the Eternal Everything—that which is beyond all beginnings and ends—then all of creation is seen for what it is—nothing—the Nothing—the shadow of the Everything. With this achievement comes Infinite Knowledge and from this comes Infinite Knowing which makes understanding of all and everything effortless, easy, and true.”

“And Ayushya, why do you think that Baba tells us all of this?”

“Perhaps He wants to de- mystify the ‘big picture' for us, while continuing to remind us that our knowledge—our knowing— is not experiencing and that experiencing is the goal.”

“That is His game.”

“Indeed Grandfather, indeed.”

“Ayushya, I too enjoy meditation and have had experiences similar to those you describe in your blog and I have noticed that when I am able to be aware of my mind and its thoughts, without becoming lost in them, that some thoughts have much more energy than others. They pull me in more. They make me want to feel that they are really important. I assume that this energy is emotional energy, but I wonder where it comes from.  Is it another aspect of mind or something else?”

“And I too have considered the same question in light of what Baba has said—remember that it was your dear grandfather and you who have so aptly named me Ayushya—Baba’s talking parrot—and what else can a parrot do but to repeat what it has heard, and this repeating in no way suggests that it is the parrot’s understanding or knowledge.

“Now Meher Baba has said that the subtle planes of higher consciousness—the first, second, and third planes, are the planes of power—energy—while the fifth and sixth planes are the planes of mind, thought and feeling. Everything rains down from the higher to the lower and so I have come to the conclusion that it is the second section of mind, the feeling section, that, as it were, rains down to the lower higher planes the energy of the first three planes.”

“And the forth plane?”

“Yes, the forth plane; do you remember my blog about the sandhi?”

“Yes, the sandhi is the joint between things.”

“Yes, exactly, and so the fourth plane of the subtle world is the sandhi between the subtle and the mental worlds of the fifth and sixth planes. Now, as the saying goes,’ as above, so below’, so my sense is that when our thoughts are energized in the way you describe, they are attracting energy from the subtle world that radiates from the second section of mind in the mental world.”

“And why do some thoughts attract this energy while others do not?”

“Yes, that is the question. Again my sense is that desires and attachments pull that energy down.”

“That makes total sense to me, and so what do you do when you are in that state?”

“In fact that is the easiest thing to do; what I do is to bring my mind to Meher Baba. Remember what I said earlier;

 ‘The senses are superior to the objects of the senses,

The mind is superior to the senses,

And the Self is superior to the mind.

That Self and Infinite, Eternal God are One.’

“For me, Meher Baba and the Self—my real Self—are One,  and so to remember His name is to remember myself—my  real Self—and that lifts me right out of the illusory suffering of my illusory consciousness  and I feel happy. Mind you, I am not saying that I am experiencing my real Self at that moment, but what I am experiencing is a shadow, or a reflection, or a radiation, of His consciousness—His Avataric consciousness.”

“Perhaps you can say that what you are experiencing is His Mercy and His Grace.”

“Yes, that is it my friend, it is His Mercy and His Grace that flows to us through His Avataric Consciousness!”

“Yes Grandfather, I believe that you have spoken truly.”

“Indeed, my dear, if I have, it is by His Grace.”

“Indeed!”

“Indeed!”

                                                                                                     (c) copyright, Michael Kovitz 2016