Meditation and Prayers on 101 Names of God
Meditation and Prayers on 101 Names of God – revised second edition by Michael Kovitz, available now at:
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The
God-man (Avatar) and the man-God (Perfect Masters) remind us again and again
that only God exists and that we are that God—that we are eternal and infinite
bliss—but that we are asleep in our impressions of illusion and, identifying
with that illusion, take ourselves to be transitory and finite beings—man.
In
the following excerpt from my book, Meditation and Prayers on 101 Names of
God, I playfully pose the question to God: Since You are the One sleeping
in me, why don’t You end the game of forgetting Yourself in me and awaken me as
You and You as me?
Fifty-one: A-faremosh
Never-forgetting
And so, to awaken, You began to dream,
and because Your dream was so lucid,
You forgot that it was a dream.
Because it all seemed so real,
You forget Yourself,
and are now convinced that You are Me.
As me,
You live the life of the Holy Ghost,
believing in the illusion
of life and death,
pleasure and pain,
loss and gain.
Now, I am beginning to feel, perhaps it is
time
to lose Your taste for oblivion,
to stop being a ghost,
and to remember Yourself?
Oh Never Forgetting,
as the Holy One in me,
isn’t it time for You to assert Your State
of Never-forgetting,
and allow Yourself to awaken in me?
I’m
not sure where I first heard the story of the beggar and the king, perhaps it
was from Meher Baba or one of his mandali. It speaks to the state of duality,
the hand-servant of Maya, the power that makes illusion appear real. Beggar and
king is a pendulum which swings back and forth, life-time after life-time,
until its momentum is spent. There are many pendulums; male and female, poor
and rich, sane and insane, dull and witty, black and white, Christian and Jew,
Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist…
Some
yogis practice a kind of meditation called neti, neti–(I am) not
this, not this.
Forty-two: A-satoha
Unconquerable
The haughty king looks out his window
with disdain at the beggar in the street
below.
The self-pitying beggar looks up at the
palace window
with envy and desire in his heart.
Both king and beggar, condemned by the
Great Laws,
exchange their parts again and again,
for lifetimes on end,
until one day the sight of the beggar
arouses the King to thoughts:
Both king and beggar I have been,
and whether my garb be royal or
ragged,
in Reality,
Pure, Celestial, Soul,
I am.
And on that day also,
the beggar sees the king and thinks:
Both beggar and king I have been,
and whether my garb be ragged or
royal,
in Reality,
Pure, Celestial, Soul,
I am.
Oh A-satoha,
the game of king and beggar is the Illusion
that sustains the Reality of Divine Oneness,
and in that game, You play the roles of
conqueror and conquered,
while in Reality You remain —
Unconquerable.
The
following excerpt has a play on the word Dadar. In the Parsi neighborhood of
Mumbai there is a railway station called Dadar station. The word ‘station’ is
also used to describe particular states of consciousness along the inner
landscapes of mystical experience. Of course, Dadar’s Station refers to the
state of God realization—the beginning and end of the wayfarer’s odyssey to
Himself.
Ninety-five: Dadar
Divine Creator
Divine Creator of the three worlds
and of all beings You are —
not the mind, but That which makes the mind
work;
not the powers, but That which empowers;
not the enchantments, but That which
enchants;
not the gods, but That which makes them
godly;
not the angels, but That which gives them
wings;
not all beings, but That which gives all
being life;
not the dream, but the dreamer;
not the breath, but the breather —
Oh Dadar, Divine Creator,
all trains arrive and depart Your Station.
I humbly request the following:
Please see to it
that before we are allowed to leave Your
Station,
a return ticket is already safely in our
hands.
In this
selection from Meditation and Prayers on 101 Names of God I
speak about a very powerful dream I had. The one in the dream was Meher Baba.
You know, much
is made of the God-man’s suffering. What is this suffering? It’s not because we
are bad; it’s not because He takes on suffering—though He does do that out of
His mercy for all creation; the God-man’s suffering is the suffering of
unrequited love. How many times has He told us that all He wants from us is our
love? Yet His creation turns its back on Him. “Not now Baba.” I’m too busy
Baba.” “Later Baba, after I’ve done this or that.” “Oh Baba, I am not worthy.”
And that is His real suffering. He just wants to give us his love and we
demure.
In my dream I
demurred. Why? Because in the moment of that intimacy with God I felt that I
was disappearing, dissolving, being consumed—and I couldn’t let go of myself—my
false self. Perhaps I just wasn’t ready—yet…
Ninety-two: Khawar
Infinitely Patient
Age after age,
You stand in our midst
and give Your divine call,
“Come all unto Me.”
Age after age,
You see us approach,
only to divert our glance,
and demure Your intimacy.
In my dream You tossed the ball to me and I caught it.
You tossed it again harder, and I returned it to You.
Again and again You tossed the ball,
harder and harder still.
In wonder I watched it ricochet off of ceiling, walls and floor.
I leapt and dove, and caught it every time,
and returned it to You with joy and pride.
When You stopped throwing,
we were standing very close,
and in Your silent smile,
I experienced an intimacy
I had never known —
and I was very afraid.
Unable to bear the intimacy I meekly said ,
“I guess we should return to the others who await You?”
and You looked at me
and I looked into Your eyes
and in them I saw Your disappointment.
I knew my words had wounded You deeply.
“I want nothing more than your love,” I heard You say
before You disappeared and I awoke,
my face wet with tears of sadness and regret.
Seventy: Gail-adar-gar
Transmuter of Dust
into Fire
There is no life in the real dust;
it nourishes nothing,
sustains nothing,
and has no interest in anything.
All hopes and aspirations end in dust,
and by being useless in every way,
dust wins the heart of the Beloved,
Who turns it into Fire.
“Like waves upon my head the circling curls,
So in the sacred dance weave ye and whirl.
Dance then, oh heart, a whirling circle be.
Burn in that flame—is not the candle He?” – This couplet attributed to
Jalal al Din Rumi
The
series of Names beginning with Name 62 (Adar – nam – gar) and going to Name 71
(Gail – vad – gar) felt to me to be the most mystical of all the 101 Names
of God. They all speak about transmutation of subtle elements—fire into dew,
dust into water, etc. A diversity of teachings includes earth, water, fire,
air, and ether, but dust is something different. What is dust? Meher Baba said,
perhaps quoting Hafez and others, “Become like dust at the feet of the Master.”
What is dust? Gail-adar-gar was my meditation on this question.
Years
ago, when I was president of the Meher Baba Center in Chicago I was walking the
short block from my house to the Center and I felt Meher Baba’s voice asking me
a question. “Do you remember when as Jesus I said to my disciples, ‘Ye are the
salt of the earth, but what good is the salt if it loses its salt-ness..?’ What
do you think I meant?” I responded, “Baba I don’t know. I have no idea.” I felt
Baba’s voice inside me again. He said, “Salt flavors and preserves life, but
nothing grows and lives in salt. I was telling my disciples to be like salt and
they would preserve and flavor life—for others—while they would remain barren
to life, without desires and cravings. I was saying that if they lost their
salt-ness—became lost in desires they would become worthless to life and to My
work.”
-----------------------------------
Meher
Baba once made a line drawing of a chicken—He called it the mischievous chicken
and said that it was Himself. He told the story of the mother hen and her
chicks and how one of the chicks was very mischievous indeed. The mischievous
chick would wander out from under the mother hen’s protective wing which
frightened his mother. She would retrieve the chick only for him to sneak away
again. Each time he went further and further away until the one time the mother
gave up trying to find him.
The
story that Meher Baba told, which can be read in its entirety in the
book, The Nothing and the Everything – by Bhau Kalchuri, is
about the journey of the first soul to gain consciousness of itself in the
beginningless beginning. It is the story of the Avatar—the Ancient One—the One
who comes again and again as the Messiah, the Christ, the Buddha…
What
I found most poignant about the story was that after the mischievous chick
completed his journey to realize himself as God, he looked around and noticed
that all the other chicks had followed him out from under their mothers’ wing.
Bhau tells us that at that moment the mischievous one “did what he had never
done before: He pitied. He took pity on creation, and took on the
responsibility for all time for each creature in creation…Oh what mischief! Oh
what compassion! Oh what love! He has come again and again to look after His
creation and to help each proceed to God, and He has come again in the form of
Meher Baba.”
In
my meditation on the 59th Name of God I was inspired to tell
this same story in a different way:
Fifty-nine: A-minogar
Creator of the
Profoundly Spiritual
From Your Deep Sleep You began to dream,
and You dreamt more and more,
and You became absorbed more and more,
until You went to the limit,
and then You turned back.
The Whim became conscious,
Your dream, Divine,
and You began to awaken.
Passing through numberless experiences
of sights, and sounds, and powers,
You became the mind,
master of thought,
and master of feeling.
Then You awoke and You were Nothing.
Nothing underwent the transformation to Everything,
and You took Your rightful seat on the Divine Throne.
But when You looked out upon the Kingdom of Yourself,
You noticed that You were still not free,
that the dreams from which You awoke continued to be,
and all the creatures and beings You had created,
were still mired in their illusory stories.
Creator of the Profoundly Spiritual,
You took mercy upon Yourself,
and rejoined the dream to awaken Your reflection,
in all Your shapes and forms.
Oh A-minogar, You became the Savior,
eternally bound in Your own Divine Responsibility.
Oh Parvardigar, You are,
Preserver and Protector of All.
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